Choking On A Scene: Oh My God, What Made Me Think I Was A Writer!

Someone posted a quote about facing your fears today as a writer. I’ve been suffering. This chapter I’m working on is bogging down. I’m unsure of the structure and flow of the chapters I’ve already completed. Other stories are poking their noses into my thought flow. This is the first month I’m without a paycheck of my own….talk about sequestration and austerity measure. Shite!

The last two weeks have been spent ill, recovering, bickering with insurance adjusters and teenagers. That insurance adjuster is lucky I didn’t bash him unconscious with his clipboard. My contractor and friend intervened. I was relegated to the house while the Beard and Contractor played good cop. Part of my unease and agitation is the intrusion of life onto my work time. I’m having trouble getting into the flow because there’s so much noise going on around here that I can’t focus.

It doesn’t help that this scene is bogging down. Face my fears….write on the page. I suppse even if it’s crap, it needs to be cleared out of my head. I don’t have to put pressure on myself because the beauty of editing is just that. I’ve nothing to worry about. No one has to see that bogged down scene. It’s in my head, so I need to write it, but I don’t have to love it.

Do I control the laundry or does it control me? Hot damn….breakthrough. Oh, my scene is still bogged down, but I’ll write through it and find the nugget of story that is in there somewhere. Ahhh…..I’m off to teach yoga. I’m having brunch with a friend (at my place…she’s on furlough because of the government shut down and I’m just broke). I’m going to write today. Something.

Bam. Faced it.